Warming Center...

 Beloveds.

How are you? Really.

Check in with You.

I'm still on a social media break (going on three weeks... but also, what is time rn?), 

But 

I wanted to share this note I just wrote to myself after an unexpectedly emotionally laborious errand to and from an otherwise routine annual appointment:

Tamp

12 degrees in '21. 12? Fine...

Time, bitterly still and blindingly quick.

Passing boarded-up windows plastered with slogans

    Protest

    Solidarity

    For Sale/For Rent/Space Available

On one storefront:

    #JusticeFor

And a list of names...

The window too small

for all the names...

Your phone pings your arrival before you even reach the door.

That New App Magic. Okay...

Waiting.

And movement.

And more waiting.

You are grateful to have access to this care.

You wait.

Questions you expect.

You don't expect

"What breaks your heart?"

is "easier" to answer than

"What brings you joy right now?"

You don't expect

The feeling your response to 

[What's a typical day like?]

Is inadequate,

Because what is typical right now?

You scoff at yourself... 

And all of the sudden (though not really)

Your heart is in your throat,

And you're glad you're wearing a mask,

and your giant glasses

to hide the twisting of your lips, your cheeks,

maybe even the tears welling up in your eyes.

Maybe you can blink them back before they spill out...

But you can't and they do... 

Beloved, 

I understand we don't want to cry

in the cold

in this office

in public

into our mask,

AND

Beloved,

It's okay

to feel the deep ache,

building up in our gut

until we can't say another word

until we let loose the sob.

I understand, we like to give our catharsis parameters.

But maybe

It just needs space. Like us, Beloved We.

And, here's the best part, there's plenty of space available.

Also, If you need info on warming centers in Illinois, call 3-1-1 and they'll give the most up-to-date info.

Take care, Beloveds.

Have you ever tried to send a text while your "purples" are dilated?

Stay prayed up. The Lord is at work making all things new.